Taking Back a Cheater.

Some of y'all are gonna catch feelings but y'all need to understand something..

In my opinion taking back a cheater is a big no no. Yes people make mistakes but one thing I don't fuck with in a relationship is cheating. And don't give me that "but I love him/her" shit either. If they cared enough, they wouldn't have done it. Once you cheat on me, I'm out. 

NOW, if you do end up taking a cheater back, there are a few key things you need to keep in mind:

• Once you take them back, your trust in them won't be 100%, and to me that's not a real relationship.

• You chose to take them back, so you CANNOT use their cheating against them. You took them back knowing they've cheated on you, which means you've accepted it and moved on. So don't give them a hard time with your accusations and what not because they've already proved to you that they can't be trusted yet you made that conscious decision to take them back.

Don't sit there and continuously tell them how much they've hurt you and how wrong they did you because, once again, as I said before, you chose to take them back knowing all of that in the first place.

• If you choose to take them back, allow them to regain your trust.

• Not saying that this is always the case but, if they've broken your trust once, don't be so shocked and angry that they do it again. Once again, refer to my second point.

• Don't expect them/feel like they owe you something. A lot of people have this idea that because someone cheated on them, and that they've taken them back, that person owes them something.. as if they're forever indebted to them. No. That is not the case. They don't owe you anything, except maybe having to regain your trust. Once again, refer back to point #2.

That's it for now though. This is such a huge topic, so stay tuned for more to come..

Jealousy

So.. I already got some of the things that had to be said out of the way.. but because it's me, there's more that needs to be addressed.

-jealousy.

We all know the famous Jay-Z line "Males shouldn't be jealous, that's a female trait"
I mean, I like it too and all, but in the case of a relationship, it goes both ways.

A lot of people make jealousy in relationships out to be something bad. But think about it.. if your significant other was not jealous of another girl/guy flirting, checking you out etc, then they clearly don't care about you. And foreal, don't give me that "oh I'm not jealous cuz I know at the end of the day they're mine" nah... I don't buy that.. It doesn't work that way.

In a relationship, you need some sort of jealousy in order to keep the relationship healthy. I know it's weird to say and all, but trust me on that.

Don't get me wrong though, everything must be done in moderation. Don't be the crazy ass jealous girlfriend/boyfriend that everyone is scared of. 

Don't be the "calls every 5 minutes, 10 times, to see where I'm at, what I'm doing, who I'm with etc" person because that's straight up pushing it and being insecure. What I'm trying to say is, be jealous to a certain extent. Jealousy is only healthy in certain doses. If you're overly jealous, then it's honestly just annoying and harmful to the relationship because at this point you're not jealous, you're straight up insecure. No one likes overly insecure people.

Jealousy makes the person you're with feel like they truly care about you. In a sense, it keeps the spark there.

REMINDER: IN MODERATION

Foreal...

I'm just going to play devils advocate here and say that relationships are not confusing. Yes.. not confusing.

Lets just set the record straight.. Just a couple of things that need to be put out there:

• Relationships aren't difficult, it's the people in them that make them difficult.
• We've all at one point blown something out of porportion when it really didn't need to be. Doing that in a relationship is so common, and lets be honest here, it's mostly the females that do it. 9/10 times the situation isn't even that serious.. so why waste your breath and make it a bigger deal than it already is? Not only are you complicating things, but you'possibly ruining your relationship. C'mon son.
• I know this is cliché, but communication is key. 
• Ladies, if something is wrong, if he's not doing something right, if he messed up... TALK TO HIM! I can't stress that enough. How else is he going to know what's wrong if you don't tell him? Men aren't mind readers.. just like how you want to know what's going on with him (you want him to fill you in and don't want to feel like you're on the outside) he does too. So tell him how you feel, and stop expecting him to just know, before you get mad at him. 
• Men, don't leave her in the shadow. She wants to feel like you're involving her in your life. She wants to feel like she's a part of you and that she matters. It's no secret that women tend to be more emotional and over-analytical, so when you leave her in the shadow she has no other option but to guess and assume. So save her the headache, and most importantly, save yourself the headache and accusations and just fill her in.
• Fuck hearsay.
• That "he said, she said" shit needs to get cut out. Unless there's proof, believe what you see, not what others see. A lot of people don't realize that there's a shit load of bitter people out there that can't wait for you to break up, so you can be single and bitter with them too.. So, creating a problem because of hearsay is only gonna make them feel better. If you don't trust the person you're with, why are you with them in the first place?